The problem is that she has feelings that prevent her from having a fact-based conversation about the computer and other household needs. You mentioned that for some couples when the sex drive goes away there is anger about that, but for some couples there is actually a peacefulness that sets in when the sex drive is gone. What to do and not to do when a female partner is upset. His Mars/Venus book series has forever changed the way men and women view their relationships. A Feminist wrote a book called, Men Are Just Desserts. But estrogen doesnt lower stress for women. Well I AM upset. John Gray: Yeah, all of my friends love to go on walks with me (laughs). When I want something, it doesnt seem so important. Im still amazed at the relevance that Men Are from Mars still has, 25 years after it was published! He asked if he could talk to me, but I said, Do so at your own risk because youll end up wanting to get back involved in this relationship.. His many books, blogs and free online workshops at MarsVenus.com provide practical insights to improve relationships at all stages of life and love. I will just present Bonnies four responses because she is the one who gets my sympathy today. Bonnie: Whats wrong with the computer you already have? How a woman being in her masculine all day. We are on a mission to end chronic disease and create a New World of Health. Our foundation status ensures we are not motivated by profit over people. I ask questions like, Is it really fair that I have to put up with this kind of abuse over and over? I ask, Is this really the best she can do? I ask, Is it always going to be like this.. A simple impactful change is to go on a complaining fast. I just want you to know in advance that it sounds worse than it is. PR.com: Like you say in the book, when a woman goes off to get a massage, for example, it is to escape all of her responsibilities. If we are going to spend money, there are other things we could spend it on. John Gray: It is missing and it needs to be created more and more. Please read our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy carefully, by using our Website, you agree that you have read and consented to our Terms of Use. John tells her he was going to buy a new computer. Thats why Ive written this book and put a big emphasis on the sex part of it. John Gray is the author of the most well-known and trusted relationship book of all time, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. Our lives are marred by fast-paced schedules and a barrage of technology, and gender roles are no longer clearly defined, but there are simple adjustments that can be made to re-balance male and female hormonal harmony. How a woman can dive deep and realize what other needs she has for connection in a relationship and not just intimate needs. Did you know that heart break can lead to heart disease? These roles that men and women have had, to various degrees, had pretty much stayed the same for thousands of years. Whenever we have something new to share that we know will benefit you on your journey (free resources, video trainings, personal insights, and special offers), we share it through free email updates. I would be thinking, Is she going to call, or is she not going to call?. That wasnt the right part. First let me say that the Notify me checkboxes do appear, but only when youve indicated youre going to leave a comment. You did it again! I helped him see her point of view, and I helped him see how he created the mess. Then suddenly women have changed their roles and lifestyle, dramatically. John Gray: Its blowing everybody away. PR.com: Even when your kids were really little? Im sure they cared enough about each other to say, Just go off and be happy. Or it could have been the other way around. I have no issue with that aspect of feminism. But daily life doesnt let us access those kinds of intense feelings. . Dont I do anything nice? Web812 Bonnie Gray Photos and Premium High Res Pictures - Getty Images Images Creative Editorial Video Creative Editorial FILTERS CREATIVE EDITORIAL VIDEO 812 Bonnie Gray Premium SELECT OPTIONS SAVE TO CART But often its the way [couples] talk to each other that causes the problem in the first place. Theres the guy who just likes girls and also has male friends. John Gray is the founder of the now vast Mars/Venus industries: books, seminars, websites, and so on. But to simply put it, testosterone is the hormone of sex for men, and oxytocin is the hormone of sex for women. Women before menopause require 10 times more estrogen than men. Just the fact that I could talk about my feelings without you getting upset with me makes me feel so loved. It suddenly gave me more interest in her, it made me more motivated. Dr. Grays books are translated into approximately 45 languages in more than 100 countries and continues to be a bestseller. John Gray uses his interactions with Bonnie mostly to provide instructions to men about how to deal with wives who seem petulant and unreasonable. Im going to write it to men and to women because that is my message and men and women, equally, come to my seminars. My message tends to be just as validating to men as it is to women. Every man who has a heart attack has low testosterone. Please contact us anytime at help@healcircle.org for any questions or to just connect and share your thoughts! How do they find their way back to each other under these circumstances? The cure for overwhelm + stress is here: a simple yet powerful21-minute morning system that melts stress and gives you more energy through 6 science-backedpracticesand breathwork. PR.com: So oxytocin is our version of testosterone. I disagree with nearly everything in them, with one exception. To this day, wherever I go, people say that the book saved their marriage. This approach asks his patience as a favor to her and promises that the barrage will be as brief as can be, still allowing time for the feelings to be expressed. I dont know if you have seen this pattern in the therapy that you do, but having a child accentuates the differences between men and women, tenfold. We just hang out and we update each other on our lives. His wife said that he had been feeling a little different over the past couple weeks before he went to the ER on Thursday, July 7, 2022 - where he was quickly admitted to the critical care unit. PR.com: Ive heard a lot of these stories from women I know; young women in their twenties and early thirties. These are role mate relationships where people play out their roles in order to create harmony. Gray is not asking men to be more aware of their feelings. And so is Bette, although if I did let it slip and act like that, she would say, Thats not like you at all. Little does she know. Therapy is quite often biased in that way, in reinforcing the womans dissatisfaction in attempting to change a man and his nature, rather than using his nature to be most supportive of her. The BREATHE Essentials Pack boasts a synergy of botanical extracts & essential oils to further support the 7 core pillars of vibrant existence. When you do that, she can share her emotions in a more positive way. Why giving a woman 4 hugs a day will help keep their estrogen in regular supply and increase. John Gray/company John and Bonnie Gray are no ordinary couple. Their love story unfolded in a series of popular self-help books that have sold millions of copies and have been translated into 5o languages. They are the original Mars and Venus - yes, that "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus." He is an avid follower of his own health and relationship advice. The importance of doing a lot of little things for your female partner to help build their estrogen back up. Profitieren Sie von der globalen Reichweite, datengesttzten Erkenntnissen und einem Netzwerk von ber 340.000 Content-Anbietern von Getty Images, die exklusiv fr Ihre Marke Inhalte erstellen. We have been waiting six months to redo our floor. Your friend is having a problem with their spouse, and you listen to them and empathize with them, but most people dont understand that your friend also has a part in that process. A while back everybody was asking me why Tipper Gore and Al Gore would get a divorce. New York publishers then wanted to re-publish it so it could go national. My jobs much easier then. PR.com: How can a couple break the cycle where anger and resentment builds up, so their sex life dies, and the lack of sex creates further tension and drives them further apart? OWN is a singular destination on cable. WebAuthor John Gray & his wife Bonnie lying on a hammock in their backyard. (Photo by Acey Harper/Getty Images) PURCHASE A LICENSE. He is an avid follower of his own health and relationship advice. We just need to know what their needs are, and to realize how we have sabotaged the situation. An advocate of health and optimal brain function, he also provides natural solutions for overcoming depression, anxiety and stress to support increased energy, libido, hormonal balance and better sleep. John Gray: No. We charge a nominal fee for our Bootcamps in order to cover our costs of running the bootcamps and the doctors time. My wife has two womens groups as well as a host of female friends. (He says he didnt like being questioned, but by saying as little as this, he was able to prevent clashing with her). I just have a lot of feelings coming up. His approach combines specific communication techniques with healthy, nutritional choices that create the brain and body chemistry for lasting health, happiness and romance. HealCircle is a platform for doctors to offer actionable affordable health programs. Dr. John Gray 1:20:46 Thank you. It could look adversarial to a bystander, but it really isnt. Its not a big deal but I just want you to know about it .. It has tried to feminize men. But to become like a woman is not the answer. John and Bonnie Gray, Just Doin TheirJobs. When the kids were little we didnt have that much sex. Bonnie says, I have a lot of feelings coming up, and I would like to talk about them. I think its probably one of the unique characteristics of the book. (LogOut/ Are you serious about your health? Dr. Gray lives in Northern California where for 34 years he happily shared his life with his beautiful wife, Bonnie, until her passing in 2018. 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